Sex Stories

It wasn’t a typical New York scene. The loud, congested bustle of
Times Square was much the same as usual. However, as I walked north on
Broadway I stopped dead in my tracks. On the corner was a large group
of foreign sailors. They were awfully darned cute in their navy blue
uniforms and white hats. I took advantage […]

She was wearing a skin tight red bodysuit when we first noticed
her. There was nothing left to the imagination with this suit -
you could see the outline of her small yet nicely shaped breasts,
and every now and then, even the nipples would show. The suit
clung to her waist and hips, and showed a […]

The skinny girl, the one with the bony hips and the tits that looked like
they got stuck on afterwards with modeling clay, just read you a list of your
faults - I mean, like a list written on one of those long sheets of yellow
paper with the blue and red lines for Pete’s sake - and […]

21.Do hungry crows have ravenous appetites?
22.Is it possible to be totally partial?
23.What’s another word for thesaurus?
24.If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
25.Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
26.Why do steam irons have a permanent press setting?
27.Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
28.Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they […]

1. If you throw a cat out a car window does it become kitty liter?
2. If corn oil comes from corn, where does baby oil come from?
3. How did a fool and his money get together?
4. How do they get a deer to cross at that yellow road sign?
5. If it’s tourist season, why can’t […]

“G” is a submissive who has taken an oath of slavery to me, her
master. She is tall and very slender with blonde hair that falls to
her shoulders Her legs are long with a lovely taper to the waist.
Her breasts are pert with saucy red nipples. […]

Lorena Bobbit Virus: turns your hard disk into a 3.5
inch floppy
Woody Allen Virus: bypasses the motherboard and turns
on a daughter card
Tonya Harding Virus: turns your .BAT files into lethal
weapons
Paul Revere Virus:warns of an impending virus infection:
1 if by LAN, 2 if by C:\
Hillary Rodham Clinton Virus: instantly turns 1K of disk
space into 1 Meg
Ollie […]

Q: What’s the fluid capacity of Monica Lewinsky’s mouth?
A: 1 U.S. leader
Q: What do you call a virgin on a waterbed?
A: A cherry float.
Q: What did the sign on the door of the whorehouse say?
A: Beat it - we’re closed.
Q: Why do walruses go to Tupperware parties?
A: To find a tight seal.
Q: What’s the difference […]

A teacher was wrapping up class, and started talking about tomorrow’s
final exam. He said there would be no excuses for not showing up
tomorrow, barring a dire medical condition or an immediate family
member’s death. One smart ass, male student said, “What about extreme
sexual exhaustion?”, and the whole classroom burst into laughter.
After the laughter had subsided, the […]

Twas the night before Christmas, and boy was it neat.
The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat.
The doors were all bolted, the phone off the hook,
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy and I in the nude,
Had just hit the bedroom and reached for the […]